华盛顿邮报搞了一个比赛，要求写两行押韵的诗......

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华盛顿邮报搞了一个比赛，要求写两行押韵的诗，第一行能多浪漫就多浪漫，第二行能多不浪漫就多不浪漫，以下是一些入选作品
4 _* D# h, [! D$ g2 b, c3 E7 A- H* P
1. My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife:
Marrying you has screwed up my life
1 l1 S8 p! P. f4 p* D我的心肝，我的挚爱，我美丽的贤妻，
# q+ ^1 L5 I' b( L我这辈子就毁在你手里。
2. I see your face when I am dreaming.
$ r0 d( O  u# }1 @1 a) ~" EThat's why I always wake up screaming.
你的容颜依稀入梦境，
: O9 J% |5 a( w* G& ?于是我在尖叫中惊醒。
3. Kind, intelligent, loving and hot;
% g/ `  S+ n( lThis describes everything you are not.
善良、聪慧、多情而性感，
6 \; N7 t5 v) O7 N' t可惜这些你一条都不占。
4. Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss,
9 g' q5 Q  e6 w& _: ], sBut I only slept with you 'cause I was pissed.
爱是上天赐福，爱情多么美好，
可我与你同眠只是因为喝高。
% {4 N) U+ ~9 `1 J- `5. I thought that I could love no other
, V& o- q' p3 D; b-- that is until I met your brother.
曾以为一生只爱你一个
: L+ u. V7 o% P  V0 N2 F& Z- ~直到遇见你的二表哥。
6. Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you.
: g5 R2 R- s# r3 R6 a6 IBut the roses are wilting, the violets are dead,the sugar bowl's empty and so is your head.
娇艳的紫罗兰，鲜红的玫瑰，甜蜜的糖，就像你一样美。
但紫罗兰会凋谢，玫瑰会枯黄，糖碗空空如也，和你的脑袋一样。
! ^) h" N# o7 G6 c8 i# z* `; q7. I want to feel your sweet embrace;
; @7 B7 v: G! o$ nBut don't take that paper bag off your face.
我渴望你温柔的拥抱，
但别把你脸上的面具摘掉。
- _2 H* b6 h) f2 }9 S8. I love your smile, your face, and your eyes
; h" E+ ]# P7 ^- w: {Damn, I'm good at telling lies!
我爱你的明眸，你的脸庞，你的微笑，
妈的，我真是说谎不打草稿！
# i1 F8 T7 ?. v9. My love, you take my breath away.
What have you stepped in to smell this way?
爱人啊，你简直让我窒息，
4 }" }3 a4 o1 [9 R" o你在哪沾上的一身臭气？
10. My feelings for you no words can tell,
Except for maybe "Go to hell."
1 x& O$ _- T) {0 V; w2 J: _我对你的深情无法付诸言语，
除了一句“滚一边去”！
2 C1 h2 J& \: j$ N5 Z, A11. What inspired this amorous rhyme?
2 X, f- d$ Y$ P/ |0 z+ @5 lTwo parts vodka, one part lime.
是什么激发了我多情的诗篇？
伏特加两杯，酸柠檬一片。